Sunday, May 31, 2009

I'm pretty sure.....

....that one of the photos in today's paper of the kids winning piano scholarships is not that of a sixth-grade boy.

Unless he got held back about 40 times and had a sex-change operation along the way.

Friday, May 22, 2009

It's Official

Missouri drivers are better than Illinois drivers.

Missouri drivers ranked 15th on GMAC Insurance's 2009 National Drivers Test, while Illinois drivers came in 29th. The average score in Missouri was 79.3, with 12.1 percent failing; Illinois' average was 76.7, with 18.2 percent failing.

Of course, Illinois includes Chicago, so that's a handicap to start with.

BTW, for all you road hogs who bitched at me back in March for my comments on aggressive driving, my score was a 95. I missed one question because my response was overly cautious.

Here's the test.

Monday, May 11, 2009

Who'll Stop the Rain?

That's what I want to know. Who will stop the rain?

Consider these incontrovertible facts. Barack Obama took office in January. John Spring was re-elected in April. Since the first of January, there has been more than ten inches of rain in Quincy. Ten inches!

Some would say Democrat/communist conspiracy, some would say mere coincidence. You be the judge, reader, but don't forget that sociopathic smile on Barack Obama's face as gas prices continue to rise and honest lawnmowing Americans are forced to return to the station to fill up their tanks again and again!

Monday, May 04, 2009

Gosh I Love Letters to the Editor

"My concern with this president is he is charming. I worked in a mental health facility and the only people this charming were sociopaths."

I'd say something snarky but it's too easy.

Liked the Quincy Onion's do on the Dogwood Parade. Well done.